Still Up

My sleeping schedule has been getting worse and worse. Since most of my friends are in New York and 3 hours ahead of me, I really have no one to talk to for hours and hours. Mathew sleeps at a normal hour and he is usually waking up when I'm going to sleep.

Anyway, today I went to Venice Beach with Mat's (and now my) friend Sara. She needed some cheap sunglasses so she swung by and picked me up on her way. There are a lot of interesting sunglasses in Venice. I wish I had thought to take pics of them. Some of them had boobs and penises, some had bows and whiskers, some had gold chains, and some just had stuff on the lenses so you couldn't even see out of them properly. They have deals like 3 pairs for $9.99. I saw a sweet pair of goggles that I am definitely considering. I want to stop tearing from the wind while riding my bike and I also want to look like Seth Green in "Can't Hardly Wait."

We got sushi, walked around, and just hung out. Venice is definitely my favorite place in LA so far. It's like Santa Monica's weird hippie uncle.

Since the traffic in LA is deplorable, she dropped me off at about 3:30 or so and I took a nap. I've been pretty good about not napping all the time but the beach always takes it out of me.

I suppose I should get some sleep. Here is a picture of the awesome synagogue we saw on the Venice boardwalk. So many great jokes, so little time.

Malibu to Venice

It was so exciting to see Shirley and Azmat yesterday. They picked me up around 12:45PM and we headed along PCH 1 to Malibu. Malibu is absolutely gorgeous. The water is really pretty and the beaches are empty and pristine.

We stopped along the highway to eat at a restaurant overlooking the water. It was really pretty. Sitting a few feet from us was Bethany Joy Lenz from the show "One Tree Hill." To be honest, Shirl and Azmat had to tell me who she was because I've never seen that show but it was cool to know someone semi famous was there. I also liked her outfit a lot and I might buy the pants she was wearing the next time I'm in Venice.

We parked along the highway and made our way down a steep hill of rocks and dirt to get to the beach. In retrospect, if we had walked 50 feet back, we would have found a less treacherous way to get down there. Despite the dangerous climb down, no one was seriously injured and it was gorgeous. The beach was virtually empty. There were only a few others near us and it was very quiet. The water was cold so there wasn't anyone swimming in it but there were some sunbathers.

On our way back south along the highway, there was a very serious car accident so the traffic was backed up really far. We decided to take a detour so we turned left at whatever street was next to try to bypass it. We ended up going to the very top of the Malibu hills along a very curvy and long road. We were so high up at some point that our ears were popping. It took forever and we were going up and down and through mountainous terrain. I'm posting a picture of the view but no picture really captured how far up we were or how amazing the view was. The detour was really long but definitely worth the time because I got to see a lot of California that I wouldn't have gotten a view of otherwise.

When we got back down, we drove to Venice so I could show them the boardwalk area. We tried to go to the freak show but unfortunately it was closed. Luckily, 70% of Venice Beach is a freak show anyway. There was a guy driving around on a motorized bike pulling around a cart with dog wearing sunglasses in it. There was also a guy in one of the bathroom stalls that was either suffering from tuberculosis or he just wasn't good at smoking because he was coughing up a lung in there. There are a few bathrooms that I absolutely refuse to go in and that was one of them.

We sat along the shore in Venice and the people next to us were wearing their socks in the sand. It looked really weird but it sort of made sense in Venice.

I was sad to see my friends leave but I was exhausted by the time I got home and I practically passed out for an hour. I think it'll be a while before someone else comes to visit but if anyone can squeeze a trip in, they are more than welcome to stop by.

Here are some pics of Malibu. One is the view from the shore, one is of the view from the Malibu hills, and one is the view of the water from the restaurant.

List of Fun Stuff

Good evening/morning. I tried for a while to sleep but I was obviously not successful. We watched the last 2012 episode of Breaking Bad so maybe it's all that excitement.

Some fun happenings lately:
1. My friend from Brooklyn, John, stopped by my neighborhood on Sunday to get some coffee and catch up. It was so nice to see a familiar face, especially one from someone awesome. It was the first time I showed a friend my apartment as well. It's really coming along and I was proud to showcase the new furniture.

2. One of my best friends in the whole world since I was a baby, Shirley, and her boyfriend are visiting me tomorrow. I am so excited, I cannot even tell you. I am going to show them around Santa Monica and we will possibly drive up to Malibu, which is cool because I have never seen it before but I hear that it's very beautiful. I wanted to avoid mentioning the Hole song about it since it was so terrible but it cannot be ignored.

3. My next door neighbors, a young couple who just moved in and are really nice, just adopted a 3-month-old kitten and Mathew and I got to meet him yesterday. He is the cutest thing in the whole world. He purrs louder than a motor and gives kisses like a dog. I hope they're okay with me moving in because leaving their apartment was a struggle.

4. Although not as awesome as the last 3, we finally got a lamp and we have a plan for the coffee tables we are going to get. We found an affordable furniture store really close to the apartment, which is where we got the lamp, and we are going to consider getting a dining set there as well.

5. I finally got my period. I know you were wondering so I'll give you some fun details on my uterus. I haven't had it in months because I have the menstrual cycle of a 14-year-old, so this one's gonna be a doozy. Cramps and PMS galore.

6. You can watch Spongebob Squarepants episodes for free with Amazon Prime. My favorite episode is incidentally the only one that didn't work properly on Netflix so after 3 years of disappointment, I got to watch it. I made Mat sit through it with me and we were both practically peeing ourselves so it was a super win.

7. My dad sent my acoustic guitar via UPS and it got here Friday. I was glad to see it. If you were wondering, the first song I played on the guitar in Los Angeles was "Horse With No Name" by America. If you had any hopes for me having any iota of coolness in me, I'm sure I just shattered it for you. Sorry.

I'm going to continue crocheting and maybe attempt at getting some sleep. Here is a photo of my lamp, one of my neighbors' kitten, Simba, and one of Mat's alma mater, which was also the high school used in the show 7th Heaven. A fun fact is that the mascot used to be the Warriors (like my high school) but the producers of 7th Heaven paid them to switch mascots to the Wildcats to make it easier for the show's production.

Okay, Okay

Here is a better entry. It's almost 2AM and I am awake so I'll update you on what's going on with my life in LA.

I opened a checking account and went to the DMV for my California license. It will be coming in 2 weeks. I am sad that I won't be using a picture of myself at 16 for an ID but it's time to move on, I suppose. California ID requires that you put your weight on there. Ugh. I hate lying to the government.

We are still working on decorating. We need a floor lamp very badly and I refuse to go another week without one. We are considering a small dining table since we have more room than I thought we did. We didn't have a dining table in Brooklyn and I couldn't stand it. I felt like I was living in a dorm. We also want a bench for the patio. I am really enjoying the sliding glass door. I leave it open all day with just the screen closed. It cools the apartment and the cats love sitting in front of it and keeping guard.

A lot of my clothes and all of my shoes arrived, thanks to my wonderful dad, and I somehow managed to fit it all in my closet with some room to spare. I spent all day yesterday cleaning the kitchen and doing laundry like a regular June Cleaver.

I met one of my neighbors and he gave me a lot of good ideas for fun stuff to do in LA. I still miss NYC a lot, though. I don't dislike LA but it doesn't feel like home. Maybe it's all the white people.

Here is a pic of my progress on the afghan so far. I am very proud of it. It is currently 50" in width and 26" in length. I am aiming for 70" in length. Sophie is just chilling next to it on our new couch with a decorative pillow we bought at Ross for $8 last night.

Someone have a baby when I'm done with this afghan so I can crochet or knit you a baby blanket. I don't want to interact with the baby, though. Let's keep this professional.

Grr

Sorry I haven't been writing. I have PMS. The end.

No Sleep 'Til... LA?

Once again, I am awake in the middle of the night. I just spent about an hour going through my IKEA catalogue and making note of some products I'd like to look into. I want some cool pillows for the couch. Mat and I were looking at the CB2 website and we liked some of the options there. They are more expensive so I'd like to take a look at IKEA first. I know, fascinating stuff. If you're still reading this, you either have the patience of a saint or you're bored in the middle of the night, too.

We rearranged the couch and chair so it is starting to look like a living room in here. We are saving space for when we are ready to get a TV. It might be a while, though, because I could really care less. This year's half of the season of Breaking Bad will be over before Mat's next paycheck comes in so I personally don't see a point in it until next year. I'm still mad at Vince Gilligan about the season 5 split up, if you couldn't tell.

We still need a living room lamp, a coffee table, another fan, seating for the patio, and maybe some decorative accents. We have given up on the elfa idea because who wants to spend $2,000 on a closet that no one but us will see? It's not worth it. I'd rather save it for a car.

I did ride my bike yesterday, despite my butt bruises. Today will involve opening a new checking account. I'm sorry beforehand for any deaths that all of this excitement may cause.

Below is a pic of my living room so far (note Sophie chilling in the arm chair) and another of Rocky once again stealing my pillows. He sleeps soundly while I watch Real Housewives episodes on the Bravo website and crochet at ass o'clock in the morning. What a dick.

MY COUCH IS HERE!!!

I just got a call from Mat saying, "The couch is on its way now. The delivery guys are 5 minutes away." I was expecting delivery on Tuesday but I am so glad it came now. And thank God I decided to clean my living room last night and that I was waiting to finish my coffee before going to the bank.

It is here now along with its matching chair and I'm very excited. It is all coming together. There is a picture below. It is obviously not the way we are keeping it but it is nice to see it in our apartment. Also ignore the cardboard boxes behind it. Those are being thrown out tonight.

I'm also including a picture of my cats' furniture. I wanted to take a picture of my cats on it but Sophie is hiding in the bathroom because she is afraid of new things and Rocky is currently on a quest to massacre any bugs that flew in here during the couch delivery.

Couch & Closet Success!

It is 1AM in California and as usual, I am unable to sleep. Last night, I was up until 4AM with a leg cramp and the night before, I didn't fall asleep until 2 for no reason and then of all things, Mat turning on the bathroom light woke me up. There was a lot more noise in Brooklyn but I somehow slept better. I don't know what that's about. Since there's nothing better to do at this hour, get ready for a really long entry. Fun! Feel free to skip to the pictures.

Yesterday, Mat made up his mind that we were going to find a couch at a furniture store in the valley called Cort Furniture and indeed we did. He said his dad had success with finding one there 15 years ago and as soon as we walked in, we found 3 or so that we were interested in. We almost settled on one when I spotted a lovely muted mustard couch that came with an arm chair for $399! Incredible. The couch only has 2 cushions but they are wide enough to fit 2 people on each one. It is really nice and I am so excited to have found something. I felt like I was living in a storage space rather than a real apartment but now that it is coming together, it is starting to feel like a home. The couch and chair will be delivered Tuesday. A big huge thanks goes to Mat's mom for making our couch buy possible! Xoxo

After the couch was purchased, we went to a mall called the Glendale Galleria. Yes, that's 3 malls in two days. I am apparently on a mall tour of LA. I have to say that this was the malliest mall of all malls. It had a Lids, a Spenser's Gifts, a Claire's Accessories, a Cinnabon, and like 5 different Foot Lockers. I haven't seen a mall so mall-like in years. I just HAD to go into Hot Topic to relive my high school years. Although it still had the red plaid bondage pants and clearance piercings reminiscent of my sophomore year of high school, they were playing rap and sold some Nikki Minaj tees, which I found to be a bit disappointing. Not as "alternative" as I remembered. Whatever sells, I suppose.

There's a Target attached to the mall so we headed in to check out fans and plastic storage bins. Since my closet's built-in storage spaces are too high for me to reach and we aren't focusing on the closets yet, I decided that something needed to be done. I was sick of pulling my clothes out of ripped cardboard boxes in my living room. We picked up a couple of cheap sets of shelving and a college dorm Tupperware set of 3 plastic drawers. I managed to fit everything in my closet just from the shelves and drawers, even my unnecessarily large bag collection. Now I'm wondering if we even need a $2,000 closet setup. Maybe one more set of cheap shelves and a stepping stool and I'd be set. We will see. I'm just excited to have a couch-ready living room.

We also stopped by Petco to get the cats an enormous scratching tower. We want to give them something to scratch and climb on that isn't our couch. They are spoiled rotten. We also got them this incredibly ridiculous thing called a Cat Sack, which they were not as excited about. It's essentially just a crinkly bag for cats to crawl in. If you'd like to see it in action, look for the HSN sales pitch for it on Youtube. The most fantastic thing about it is that it is being sold by Mike Rowe of Discovery Channel's hit show, "Dirty Jobs." It is hilarious.

We met our new next door neighbors who just moved in yesterday and they are super nice. We saw what their apartment looked like and it's really cool. I might have to steal their Ikea lighting idea since California apartments don't often come with built-in ceiling lights for some inconvenient reason that I don't understand. At least we have them in the bedroom.

All in all, it was a very successful day, minus the fact that at the mall, I saw this adorable puppy and went to pet it. The woman put another puppy in my arms and told me it was $50. I literally started freaking out. We aren't allowed to have dogs in our apartment and God only knows where that dog came from or what could be wrong with it but it was just the cutest thing. It looked like it was only 6-weeks old and possibly a yellow lab mix, which is what I really want when we are ready for a dog. I thought I was going to cry when we had to say no. Also, I found out that season 5 is the last season of Breaking Bad and it is going to be split up and only 8 episodes are airing this year. Talk about a horrible disappointment. Now we REALLY have no need for a TV.

Well, I'd better get some sleep. I will be ignoring my painful butt bruises from my bike trip and riding over to the DMV for a California ID. Fun! Have a great night (or morning for all of you in New York).

Here is a picture of our couch and a picture of the SOLD sign we excitedly got to see them put on the tag.

17 miles of LA

I miscounted my miles yesterday. In all, Mat and I biked 17 miles today. We had some errands to run and then we were on our way to The Grove, which is apparently a different place from where the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers used to hang out, much to my dismay. It is essentially just a mall but the trip was pretty nice.

We went back to Helen's Cycles for the billionth time. Actually, we have gone to Helen's every day since we got our bikes. They put some water bottle holders on our bikes for us and we bought some biker gloves because we are really lame. Since I have creepy little doll hands, I got some kids gloves on sale for $5.99. Then we were off.

I'm not going to lie, the trip there was rough in the beginning. It was the hottest part of the day and we hadn't eaten anything yet. Plus, I slept like crap. We stopped halfway to eat and there, we met this wonderful dog up for adoption at Century City. His name is Wonderdog and he was so precious! He was a small Pomeranian mix. He is available now if you are interested.

Anyway, we rode through Beverley Hills and got to see all of the fancy homes with lawn signs proudly protesting the building of a subway through there because poor people ruin everything. If they want to mow some lawns in the area for minimum wage, they can fucking walk like the animals they are. Other than the obvious class discrimination being advertised everywhere, the palm trees along the streets were fun. I saw butterflies everywhere and flowers were falling off of trees.

All in all, The Grove was not that exciting so I have nothing to really report about it. The ride home seemed a bit easier, as it had cooled down quite a bit. As we were coming down our street, I saw a hummingbird hover in midair for the first time ever. It was really incredible to see one like that.

Now we are home and I am refusing to move because I am exhausted and my butt hurts really badly from the seat. I'm excited to have not been killed, either by a car or from heat exhaustion. That's what I would call a success!

Sorry but I couldn't really take any pics due to the whole "using my hands to steer" thing. I'll try for next time.

The ABC's: Afghan, Bicycles, and Cats

Sorry about the lack of updates. To be honest, nothing of any interest has really been going on. I was feeling pretty sick today so I didn't do much but nap and get really sweaty. Other than that, the main things I've been concerned with are crocheting my afghan, riding my bike, and making sure my cats are happy.

I rode my bike to Michael's to pick up more yarn for the afghan. I am on my second skein of yarn now, which is pretty crazy. I've never had a project that lasted for more than one skein of yarn. I bought 5 altogether but it will probably take more than that. I wouldn't be surprised if I ended up going through 10 skeins of yarn on this one blanket. I'm sure that anyone who isn't a 75-year-old grandmother isn't particularly interested in my yarn craft so I will move on to something a 6-year-old boy would like: my bike.

Riding has been going fairly well. The most I've ridden at once has been 5 miles so I must say that I'm a bit nervous for the bicycle trip Mat and I are taking today. It should be about 10 miles in all, which I'm sure is no big deal to a few of my readers. However, this is the first bike trip I have EVER taken. In my life. I am not a cyclist. I have no idea how to properly change gears in my bike and yet I will be taking a trip through streets I don't know. I guess I don't need to justify myself any further. I'm excited about going and I'll elaborate more once it happens but I'll stop here for now. I don't want to become one of those people that only talks about cycling (unless you want me to. Email me for pics of my bike. Pay attention to me!).

Last but not least, something that really cool people who aren't serial killers would be interested in: my beautiful cats. They're doing very well. Sophie has stopped hissing at Rocky 24/7 and they're playing a lot more now. I even caught them playing footsie through a cabinet door. I want to get them an air conditioner because it can get really hot in here during the day and I can't imagine how hot it must be under all that fur. Yes, I know they are spoiled. Right next to me, Rocky has claimed my pillow as his new bed. As you can guess, my allergies are just fabulous.

It's almost 1:30AM so I'm going to try to get some sleep. Here is a picture of Sophie being vain. Check out our sweet mirror, though!

Gadgets and Gizmos A Plenty

Today, I acquired two cool new gadgets. One is my Arrowhead water cooler, which is really handy to have.  It makes hot water, too, so I guess my tea kettle is now fairly useless (Shh. Don't tell it).  I dragged the thing inside, which was not easy, then brought in the three enormous water jugs, and finally, two 24 packs of water bottles that they threw in for free.  I managed to hook the thing up myself, and that includes putting an open, splashing, 5 gallon jug on the top of a rickety little plastic doohicky.  The second I opened that jug, I regretted it but I somehow managed to get it on without incident.  Here is a picture of my cats giving it a thorough inspection:

                                          

The more exciting new gadget that I got is my bike! It is a beautiful, brand new 2013 Trek 7.2FX in red and I love it.  I was going to get a more demure color, since they also have it in black and gray, but I thought, "Screw it.  If you're going to do it, do it big." We got new helmets (which are a lot more expensive than I remember.  Then again, all my helmets came from Toys R Us when I was 5) and really high tech Kryptonite locks that have a feature where you register your lock and key online so in case you lose your keys, they can send you new ones.  With all the money we spent on those bikes, that lock had better be harder to get into than a pair of Lil Wayne's jeggings.

We also got racks put on the back for bags. Mat has a laptop messenger bag for his and I have a general shopping bag for mine, as seen below.  It literally just hooks onto the rack and stays there while I ride.  It's really cool.  I plan on getting a water bottle holder eventually but for now, the bottle just hangs out in the shopping bag.

Let me tell you, when you haven't ridden a bike in years, it is very difficult, especially on hilly streets while attempting to stay in a bike lane.  I had actually never ridden in a bike lane so I seriously asked the guy ringing us up at Helen's Cycles if there was some sort of speed limit.  I played it off like it was a joke but it wasn't.  I am just that bike illiterate.  I went without incident except I did fall on the floor while getting off the bike, since I wore a pair of shoes that have zero tread left in them and they slid on the slick sidewalk.  It was at an intersection and plenty of people caught that award winning move.  I would have been embarrassed if I wasn't so preoccupied with how hard riding a bike was after 15 years of only being in four-wheeled vehicles.  I had grand plans to bike down to Santa Monica beach and then head down the boardwalk to Venice but maybe I'll take it a few blocks at a time starting tomorrow.

On a more old fashioned sort of note, I have decided to crochet an afghan for our future couch.  I've been working on it for the last couple of days and I have quite a long way to go but I think it's coming out really well so far.  I must admit that I got the pattern from a YouTube video but I feel like I've learned a lot of things from YouTube including how to knit, how to do fancy makeup, and how to turn almost any vegetable into a bong. Thank God for the Internet, eh?

Couch Find Fail, Furniture Safari Win

Mat and I are in the process of locating a good but affordable couch. The one we had in Brooklyn was something my mom found for $50 in the newspaper and it lasted us for 3.5 years so I figured we could do the same here. Wrong. Craigslist yielded people asking up to $10,000 for used couches (because I'd love to pay a used car's worth of money on something a bunch of strangers put their asses on). There is a used furniture store near our house that has been in business for over 100 years so I figured I'd give it a shot. While some of the pieces were extraordinarily beautiful antiques, some of them were...well...strange to say the least. Here are some of those eye catching gems:

I honestly don't even know what the hell this is. It was like an arm chair but it could fit maybe 1.5 people. So I guess if you have a person and maybe a dog? Or a person and the ventriloquist dummy whoever would own this chair definitely has.

This is a broken church organ, for all of the broken church organ enthusiasts. 

This looks like something out of a cartoon. Who would even own this?

If you're into fancy lamps that look like your creepy uncle was in a local production of the Three Musketeers, you are in luck. There was a pair of these and they're ready for their forever home.

I don't know about you, but I always felt like what my home was missing was a receptacle for holy water.

It's like an African safari in your very own home, but with more Doritos and regret!

I wasn't aware that wheelchairs were considered furniture but what the hell, I guess.

This is an old dentist's chair. It was among the kitchen chairs, because I'd definitely put those in the same category.

I don't think words are even necessary for this one.

Ding ding! It's the double decker trolly of furniture regret!

These are some weird lamps. On the left, there is just a cage filled with what looks like yard work and on the right, there is a yellow ladies hat a la beloved children's book character Madeline. 

Obviously, this wasn't furniture but there was an oddly high number of loose, living birds in the furniture store, because nothing makes furniture sell like bird shit all over it.

So as you can see, I did not actually get any couch shopping done. However I did find something even better and that is...actually I didn't find anything better. I wasted like half an hour taking pictures of awful home decor oddities and then took a nap. Whoops.

Malls, Closets, and Cat Mucous

I don't know about you but for me, there's no better way to bring in the beginning of the week with a desperate call to the vet because your cat has been sneezing yellow snot all over the place. We just got here and already Rocky's sinuses are giving up. Maybe it's the dryness or just a virus he picked up. Sophie has been sneezing a bit too so I hope this isn't too much of a cat germ hostel.

I'm really excited because our bikes should be coming in by the middle of the week. I cannot even begin tell you half of the inefficiencies of this public transportation system. Actually, I can and probably will but I'll save that for later. Also, I don't know if they do this on purpose but there has been at least one enraged schizophrenic on my bus 100% of the time I have taken PT here. Yes, that is correct. THERE IS A CRAZY PERSON ON EVERY SINGLE BUS IN LA. Not all of them are dangerous but they're loud and disruptive and wear round space helmets to keep the mind control vibrations out.

I would really love to join this awesome bike gang, of which this is only half.

We went to a mall called the Westfield Century City Mall to plan out our Elfa closet system at The Container Store. The guy who helped us design it, Will, was super cute and loves New York. BFF! The Elfa system is incredible but also incredibly expensive. I can see that this endeavor will take a long time to complete considering it would take one of Mat's entire paychecks to afford some metal drawers. It is definitely not worth doing all at once but worth doing in pieces.

Century City is, sad to say, a very lackluster mall. I'm not a big mall person but I can appreciate a well-designed shopping center. There was a Toys R Us, however, and they were selling an off-brand Slip N Slide for $6.98 but Mat said no because we don't have a yard. And he obviously hates fun.

On the wonderful advice of my brilliant mother who reads this, we are getting a water cooler in our kitchen because I still refuse to drink the tap water since it tastes like flat sponge juice. I am anxiously awaiting its arrival.

Well, it's about time I went to bed. Goodnight. I leave you with a picture of Rocky lounging in his new favorite spot, the top of the fridge.

And All That Jazz

I guess I should start by telling you that the first Friday night here in which I interacted with other people involved doing video game arts and crafts. I can't go further into what it was since I signed an NDA but just trust me when I say it was the nerdiest thing I've done in a while (and I own a Spirit Hood and laugh out loud at jokes made on NPR).

Today, Mat's friend Sara invited us to the beach. I don't actually own a bathing suit so we just went in shorts and t-shirts and hung out in the sand. We bought a hideous beach blanket that looks like a 1930's Mexican migrant worker's poncho for $14.99 at a shore shop. Sara had a lot of friends with her and they were nice. One of them was born and raised in Santa Monica but is about to move to Brooklyn. I was a bit jealous, I ain't gonna lie.

We headed home after that and Mat's former coworker, Fox, came to pick us up to go to Costco. It had been years since I'd been in a Costco and I got a little overly excited. I probably didn't need cheap Kirkland chocolate in bulk but whatever. I'm sure that when the time comes, I can also buy bulk insulin at a very competitive rate.

We went to the In-N-Out Burger outside of Costco and there was this Japanese couple with 2 fancy little dogs. One was a Pomeranian and I'm not sure what the other one was. It was a while fluff ball. Anyway, the dogs had these harnesses with angel wings attached and the leashes were strings of pearls. It was easily one of the most ridiculous things I've ever seen. People were stopping in their tracks to stare at the little dogs, which probably have more expensive clothes than I do. Oh, LA.

Here's a picture of one of the many animals I met today. The owner offered me the chance to hold him but I politely declined. There was also a bicycle cart thing with 7 or so parrots but the guy wanted a tip for a picture. Fuck that guy.

Friday Fun Tees

I am writing this from the waiting room of a marijuana dispensary. Since I don't have my marijuana license, I am only allowed in the waiting room. The windows are all blacked out, as they must be by law, and the inside looks like the living room of someone's hip 50-something aunt.

Today marked the end of my first week alone in Los Angeles. I spent it by going to Goodwill and looking at all of the weird items they had for sale. Aside from a Santeria candle with Lucille Ball and like 10 bags of Depends, there were some award-worthy t-shirts. I literally went through every single shirt they had. I will share some of the better ones with you now.

Pros, Cons, and Reviews

I'm going to start this off with an unpaid advertisement. If you are ever in the West LA area on Wilshire and S. Barrington, be sure to stop by Lady Chocolatt for the best designer chocolate you've ever had in your life. The owners are our lovely next door neighbors and upon stopping in just to be neighborly, I fell in love. They are wonderful people and the chocolate is pure ecstasy. I think I died and went to heaven.

Anyway, I guess I'll talk about my favorite things about LA and my not so favorite things.

First off, the weather is glorious. It's always warm and sunny and the heat is dry so you don't feel like you have fever sweats. HOWEVER, my skin doesn't like it and I'm caking on more makeup than Jenna Jameson. Also, I have to be more mindful of wearing sunblock. You should really be wearing it all year long in NY as well but since the warm weather makes you want to stay outside more, it's advisable to wear it at all times.

I also like the colorful clothing here. In NY, everything is black and gray. Here, everyone wears orange and pink and all those other bright colors I was too afraid to wear on the East Coast. I'm also wearing shorts now but the downside to that is having to shave my legs more than twice a year. I like wearing sandals all year long as well, but that requires frequent pedicures. With nicer weather comes a more involved beauty regimen.

The supermarkets are nicer here, food is cheaper, fruit is fresher, and eating organic is more feasible. I am now learning to cook and it's not so bad. At least, I don't think it is. I guess you should ask my boyfriend, who has to eat it and pretend he likes it in front of me.

The beaches, of course, are cleaner and don't smell like dead fish but that's a given. And it's super liberal here which is wonderful. If you get caught smoking marijuana on the street, you just get a ticket. That is, unless it's in a school zone. Then you're screwed.

Now the cons. My biggest issue here is the tap water. It tastes like someone left cardboard soaking in it for 3 days in the sun. It's horrible and I have to buy bottled water because even a Britta faucet and a filtered water bottle don't help. Because of this, I refuse to even try California pizza or bagels because I can imagine they taste flat and similar to a fleece blanket.

The public transportation is awful, as I have said before. There is no cohesive bus schedule. It literally says "every 15-20 minutes" on the bus stop where the schedule should be. I don't know about you, but for me, there's a big difference between 9:01 and 9:21. That is the difference between getting to an appointment on time or not. I need to know when it's coming. There's also no real bus map. There are only maps for each particular route so have fun figuring out where to transfer.

I also don't like how you're pretty much forced to get a car. Maybe I don't want a fucking car. They're expensive and the upkeep is a pain in the ass. However, if you plan on having any sort of job or social life, you need a car to get there.

A lot of things here are also a little too clean cut for me. I liked the grittiness of some of the dive bars in Brooklyn and the weird hipster cafes. It seems like everything here is a bit white washed, which is definitely better for grocery shopping but not as fun for taking shots of whiskey with a grizzled Vietnam vet at an old man bar.

Well, I am going back to my coffee at Lady Chocolatt. Here is a pic of the Santa Monica pier from the pedestrian walkway.

Liberals and Hippies: Santa Monica and Venice

I am currently sitting in Planned Parenthood waiting for an appointment to get birth control. IT'S FOR MEDICAL REASONS, DAD. JESUS. Anyway, the Santa Monica PP is in a mall. That's right. It is in the middle of a shopping mall. There are zero protesters outside and while you're waiting for your Plan B, you can pick up a sensible yet hip blazer from Express. Win win.

Yesterday, I got the brilliant idea to walk from Santa Monica to Venice along the shore. It took about an hour each way walking in the sand. It was a really nice view and minus the dead bird wings floating toward my ankles in the surf, the water was very nice.

Venice is an interesting place. It was sort of like Jersey Shore for hippies. There were a lot of Rasta shops stuck in between the usual sandal/booty short tourist shops. There were also a lot of "doctors" who gave out medicinal marijuana licenses. The guys standing outside of those wore green scrubs with marijuana leaf necklaces. It was pretty awesome.

There was also a lot of cool street art and a skate park. Since it was 5PM on a Tuesday, all of the skaters were 13-year-old boys learning how to do tricks so it wasn't that interesting. I've heard it's fun on a Saturday. I was hoping to see some body builders at Muscle Beach but after a while, I got tired and walked back. Maybe I'll try again this weekend.

I'm getting more and more frustrated with the lack of passable public transportation. There are no bus schedules or bus maps. I have no idea where to transfer. The buses often come late or sporadically. It's very confusing and it sucks. The thing I miss most about NYC is the public transportation. I miss you, subway. Even you, G train.

Here are some pics of Venice Beach and the boardwalk. Have fun ogling at the hippy culture. I sure did.